Seven months seem like an eternity. It has been a difficult, yet truly humbling experience. I can't thank my family and friends and church family enough for all of the loving support, inspiration, prayers, good deeds, and more that have been done in my behalf.

I am not the type of person that can accept help very easily, I am the one bringing you dinner, the one talking to you about how you feel, the one that helps out if there is ever the need, with no expectation of anything in return, because that is what I feel good in doing, yet I have had to learn to sit back and accept graciously the kindnesses that have come to me over this very difficult journey.

I had to go to yet another viewing of someone that passed away all to young and went to dinner afterward with my old roommate. She came out an asked just exactly how I was doing and feeling and although I have days that I could kick, maim
or otherwise injure someone who is no longer here, I told her that I am really at peace with the entire situation. Yes, I am angry some days, but aren't we all when something like this happens? I have learned to accept what I cannot change. I must go on.

This is not to say, however, that I still don't have days when I cry myself to sleep, want with all of my heart to talk to him about something one of the kids did that he would love, still have to stop and think that I don't have to yell at him to get out of bed to get ready for church, talk to him about how Ashlynne wants to know which cloud he actually lives on, how Andrew holds his picture and finally falls to sleep after a particularly rough day, how Austin would just love to read a new little book from school to him, and the list goes on and on and on......

This is a daily process that will go on for all time, but I amazingly at peace and have come to to rely on our Savior more and more to heal my wounds and broken heart and allow me to take my life one day at a time.

FIRST WEEK

The first week back on the job brought the following:
Monday--mostly observation and listening, etc. I was sitting in the middle of Melody and Maria and a patient's girlfriend came right up to me and started yelling at me that if they had to wait so long for the doctor, then we had better serve bottled water. When told that she could go to the pharmacy and purchase some or step out into the hall and get a drink from the fountain, she was very put out to say the least. You would have thought I had told her that she had to cut out the heart of her first born the way she acted.

Tuesday: Was in orientation, HIPAA Training, OSHA Training, clinic Goals and Expectations, yada, yada, yada!!! The computer testing for OSHA and HIPAA for two hours. It was an all day affair.

Wednesday: More observation, learning the ropes, learning the computer before official computer training and was hit on by a very small, dirty, Hispanic man (I don't want to offend anyone, but it always seems that these are the ones I get hit on by--I wouldn't even mind it so much if I could just look them in the eye!!!)
Through all of this I am learning a little more Spanish each day! I guess I understand more than I thought I did.

Thursday: Was a very dead day at work. Only 1 1/2 doctors in--wore head phones all afternoon and only had to listen in on 3 conversations, one of which was in Spanish, and played with the computer all day trying to figure it out.
I came home and told Kassie how dead the day was and Ashlynne piped up and asked me if I had been to a funeral all day!!! LOL!!!

Friday: I am not used to being on those phones and at a computer all day long with a break and I have a very stiff neck. Did more computer work and actually did some REAL WORK with patients. Had to acutally answer a few medical assistant questions.

In a few weeks I will go and train on the OB desk and see how they run their side of the building. Then in a month or so--I will be off to learn the medical assisting end of things. I really have a feeling I will never be bored in this job!

BACK TO THE OLD GRINDSTONE

After 6 long months of searching for a job, the search has finally come to an end. I feel like a huge weight has been lifted off of my shoulders, at least 500 hundred pounds worth, and this will be my home away from home.

I will be a receptionist/medical assistant for 2 surgeons, 2 orthopedics, 1 plastic surgeon and 1 pain management doctor. I think I am going to be very busy!
The facility is in West Valley on 4100 South and just east of Bangerter Highway, which is about 4000 West. I was really hoping for something a little closer to home, but I am not going to be too picky these days. Especailly when jobs are few and far between.
A funny thing about it all is that as soon as I said yes to this position, I was offered another one on Thursday. It sounded like a great place to work, but I have bills to pay and they weren't able to pay me what Granger is paying.
So tomorrow morning at 9:00 I am back among the working stiffs! And I am sure after not having worked in an office that busy for a long while--I will be stiff by the time I arrive home.